Unsettled

I know a great deal about nursing, especially cardiovascular and intensive care. It had entered my mind on several occasions to go into nursing education but I could not settle on that idea. Instead of going into a Master of Nursing Education program or a Nurse Practitioner program, I decided to stay at the bedside and go to seminary. On May 3, 2019, I graduated from Midwestern Baptist Theological Seminary with a Master of Theological Studies degree. While I was attending seminary an idea entered into my mind to write a book about nursing and the law of Christ. However, I became distracted with the idea of further education but could not settle on what to study. 

For the past twenty-one months I have been moving from one idea to another. I have been accepted into several doctoral programs. I was accepted into the ThM program at Midwestern Baptist Theological Seminary with plans to use that as a bridge to PhD in church history because I have a great deal of interest in church history, especially baptist history. Currently I am reading “The Life and Writings of Thomas Helwys.” Thomas Helwys is the first English Baptist writer and the first to write for religious freedom for all people. 

Shortly after completing the MTS I had it in my mind to become a missionary and teach pastors who do not have the availability of seminary training. I even went on a mission trip to Cuba to teach pastors on the island. I have written an article about that trip and the ministry. I plan to post the article soon, perhaps on March 7th. Given that my mind had gone the direction of pastoral training in the mission field, I decided to do a Doctor of Ministry program instead of the PhD in church history. I was accepted into the DMin program at Midwestern Baptist but with the world health crisis and travel restrictions that followed, I was not able to return to Cuba. I lost interest in the DMin and never started it. All the while I remained at the bedside caring for my neighbor in the Cardiovascular ICU. 

Recently, I became interested in the English Separatist and have been reading about them. The first English Baptist church and the Pilgrims who established the Plymouth colony on the soil of North America originated from the same Separatist church. Therefore, it entered my mind again to study history and I was excepted into the PhD history program at Liberty University but I lost interest in that idea quickly. After this I applied for the PhD Bible Exposition program at Liberty University. I have been excepted into that program but just like with the other programs, I have not been motivated to register for classes. 

Should I study for the sake of studying? What would the Lord have me do? These are the question that I am asking of the Lord and myself. The idea of writing a book about nursing and the law of Christ has entered my mind once again. I am not yet committed to that idea, I have had trouble lately committing to any one thing except for caring for patients at the bedside. I am not interested in teaching students the Science and mechanics of nursing. However, I am interested in exploring the why of nursing and teaching others to observe all that Jesus commanded. I know that I am rambling in thought this morning but I confess that I have been unsettled in mind. I believe that the Lord has a will for me in ministry and I am seeking his will. May the Lord’s will be done!

In Christ alone,
Michael Peek
The Nurse Theologian

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